[NIGHTSTICK-ON-A-POLE MATCH]

[BIG BOSS MAN]

[VS.]

[MIHOSHI  KURAMITSU]

[*DING!*]

            “Huh?”  The crying Galaxy Police detective looked up to see a burly man racing towards her.  However, she only noticed the shiny gold star on his chest.  “Oh! Are you a police officer too?”

            Immediately, Mihoshi shot up and stood at attention, happily saluting her fellow officer as she did so. 

            “Galaxy Police Detective First-class Mihoshi Kuramitsu, at your service sir!”  Unfortunately (Or incredibly fortunate depending on how you look at it), Mihoshi’s salute was timed just right, so that it hit Big Boss Man on the chin as he charged forward, neatly turning the show of admiration into a decently devastating uppercut. 

            “UGH!”  Was all Boss Man could manage as he staggered backwards. 

            “And Mihoshi starts off with a devastating uppercut!”  J.R. cheered from ringside.

            “Wow!”  King agreed.  “What a lucky shot!  I just hope she can do it again!”

            Unfortunately (No, this time it really is), Mihoshi’s lucky shot only stunned the Big Boss Man.  The burly ex-prison guard quickly recovered and resumed his attack with a vengeance.

            Mihoshi was as clueless as ever.

            “I know I have my I.D. here somewhere,” The cute blond said as she dug through her uniform, scattering around miscellaneous items as she did so (Among them a teddy bear, a pair of sun glasses, a Mickey Mantle baseball card, a left foot roller skate, a television remote [Hey!  I’ve been looking for that!], and a key destined to unlock all of the secrets and mysteries of the universe [She’s been using it as a coaster]).  “Wait a minute.  I’ll find it.  Hold on.”

            But the Big Boss Man wasn’t about to “wait a minute”.  He was again charging towards Mihoshi at full speed. 

            “Oh, here it is!”  Mihoshi cheered as she kneeled down to pick up a small pen-like object.

            “You’re going down you little b--WAAOOHH!!!”  Boss Man’s shouted in his Southern drawl as he tripped over the kneeling Mihoshi, sending him sailing over the top rope and to the thin padding on the floor outside of the ring. 

            “How’d she do that?”  The King shouted to no one in particular.

            “I don’t know, King,” J.R. offered.  “What do you even call a move like that?”

            “Weird,” King answered with a smirk.

            “Huh?”  Mihoshi said as she stood up with her I.D.  “Where’d he go?”

At that moment, Big Boss Man was scrambling to climb back into the ring and he was angrier than ever.  In fact, he was down right pissed off, and he would’ve attacked Mihoshi from behind…That is, if she hadn’t turned around and slipped on the teddy bear she dropped earlier.

            “Whoa!!!”  The defective detective shouted as her legs were taken out from under her.  This action caused one of her flailing legs to catch Big Boss Man hard on the chin as he charged towards her.

            “AGRH!”  Was Boss Man’s phrase of choice as he staggered backwards once more.  However, he soon recovered and reached into one of the pockets of his black flak jacket.  “Oh, that is the last straw!”

            From his flak jacket Big Boss Man produced a set of brass knuckles, and discreetly slipped them on his right hand.

            “What are those?”  J.R. pondered over what the Cobb County cop placed on his right hand.  Then he noticed a familiar glint on Boss Man’s knuckles.  “It’s a God damn pair of brass knux!  The Boss Man has resorted to using brass knux, King!”  

           “I see them this time!”  King admitted.  “This is low even for the Big Boss Man!”

           “‘This time’?”  J.R. angrily mocked his partner’s habit of turning a blind eye to illegal activity in the ring.  “This time it’s really serious!”

“Alright you little bimbo,” Boss Man stated menacingly to Mihoshi as she slowly got up.  “Here’s where it ends!”

Big Boss Man rushed forward, hand drawn back and ready to deliver to the knock out blow to an unsuspecting Mihoshi…then he slipped on the roller skate Mihoshi had dropped earlier. 

“Wha-?”  Mihoshi eloquently stated as Big Boss Man’s punch missed wide and the momentum of it (and the roller skate) carried him across the ring and into the turnbuckle headfirst.  Oddly enough, it was the same turnbuckle that the pole holding the nightstick was attached to, which fell off and clocked the Big Boss Man on the head. 

With Big Boss Man knocked unconscious, the senior referee, Earl Hebner (Where did he come from?), signaled for the bell, ending the match. Mihoshi had won the match thanks to her amazingly dumb luck.

            At ringside, both veteran commentators sat with their mouths and eyes open wide in complete shock. 

            “That was the freakiest thing I ever saw,” King blinked.

            “Yeah, King,” J.R. agreed.  “That was amazing.  Either Mihoshi is the most talented and highly trained law enforcement officer ever, or she’s a complete idiot.”

            “Ladies and gentlemen,” The Announcer proclaimed after conferencing with the referee.  “Although, technically, it was Big Boss Man who got the nightstick off the pole, he is the one who’s unconscious.  So, your winner, by default, Mihoshi Kuramitsu!!!”

            “Oh!  That’s so nice!”  Mihoshi squealed in delight, but then became confused… again.  “Uh, what did I win?”

            “Idiot,” J.R. and the King agreed in unison.

            “Oooo!  A camera!” Mihoshi smiled as she waved into the nearby video-broadcasting device.  “Hi Kiyone!”

_-_-_-_-_

In Okayama, Japan…

Mihoshi’s partner sat on a couch, in front of a television set, wearing a nearly identical uniform (Sans the bunny tail), rubbing at her temples under her long, blue-green hair.

            “That idiot,” Kiyone muttered angrily.  “Why did she have to mention me?”

            “I think it was awfully nice of Mihoshi to mention you, Kiyone!  Now you’re famous!” A cute young girl with long sky-blue pigtails interjected from beside Kiyone.  “Anyway, you should be glad she didn’t get hurt.”

            “I guess you’re right, Sasami,” Kiyone finally conceded and smiled at the little girl in the apron. 

            “I honestly don’t know why either of you are watching this barbaric display,” A young woman dressed in elegant pink robes commented, her nose held slightly in the air, and her purple hair tied into two ponytails that reached almost to the floor.  “After all Sasami, you are a crown princess of Jurai.  As am I.”

            “Ayeka,” Sasami chided her older sister.  “It’s just a show.”

            “Yeah,” Kiyone addressed the older princess. “If it’s so ‘barbaric’, why are you watching it?”  

            “I am watching it for Lord Tenchi’s sake,” Ayeka regally stated.  “He is fighting tonight, is he not?”

            “Yep,” Kiyone confirmed.  “He’s fighting some guy named ‘Skywalker’.  Whoever that is.”

* * * * *

To Be Continued…